Friday, December 31, 2010

Christmas Eve 2010

Today is Christmas Eve and I am missing my family a lot today. I miss waking up and having my Dad cook everyone his traditional big breakfast. I miss the chaos of Tyson screaming in unison to my nieces and nephews that Santa came, despite a year's worth of tantrums and naughty moments. I miss deciding who was going to wear Santa's hat and pass out the gifts to everyone. I really miss hunting down the most hideous Christmas ornament of the season for my Mom and I's traditional "ugly" tree. I miss going to Hallmark and picking out an ornament that will remind us for years to come of some big accomplishment of Tyson's. I did manage to pick up a suitcase ornament before I left for Korea, but it just didn't feel the same. Something about shopping when there was no Christmas music and overcrowded stores. I miss baking cookies, pumpkin rolls, pumpkin bread, and gingerbread house with Tyson. I'm sure my neighbors are going to feel the same when they don't find their packages of goodies hanging from their door this year. I also miss going to Christmas Eve mass with my family, singing Silent Night by candlelight. I miss driving around seeing the lights, drinking hot coco, trying to pick a winner for the tackiest house of the year. I miss playing scrabble with my mom and brother in law after everyone else had gone to bed. Most of all I just miss having my family close to me.

Now I know I listed a lot of things that I miss, but there are more things that I am grateful for. I feel so blessed that we were able to spend Christmas with my family together this year. In August I had accepted the fact that we would be away from Jeff for an entire year, missing out on Christmas, birthdays and other celebrations with him. I am grateful that we are spending Christmas in a foreign country this year, experiencing so many new things and adding to our normal traditions. I am grateful that Tyson has a school where he can receive an education that I know he would not be getting if we were back home. I am grateful that he has met so many new friends, is learning a new language and seeing things that once were only possible through the Discovery channel. I am grateful that everyone in my family, her and back home, are healthy and happy. No one is in the hospital this year; no one is worried about losing someone they love dearly. I know too many people who have to see an empty chair around their dinner table and my heart goes out to them.

To everyone who reads this, I hope that you remember everything your grateful for. Remember those things more than the things you may be missing or feeling left out of. Everyone seems to get so depressed around the holidays and see only the things that make life hard when in reality it is time to see everything good in your life, no matter how small the thing that makes you smile may be.

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